Firstly, Vincent McGovern’s book, above, is out: get it here. My review, which may or may not appear on Amazon….
I suppose “entertaining” is not quite an appropriate word, given the subject matter – but entertaining it is. Fathers after separation from a partner determined to distance them from their own children find out the hard way just how badly the odds are stacked against them. Mr McGovern is well qualified to write such a book, having been through it himself and considering his 14 years in the business of supporting other fathers to remain in their children’s lives. That he manages to do so in a manner replete with black humour and idiosyncratic asides (such as crashing a swanky party in the EU Headquarters) is all to the good, sweetening a very bitter pill. And bitter it is.
One of the troubles with this business is that no one will believe how bad it is until it happens to them – and every one of them, as Mr McGovern says, thinks he is the first and it is all a terrible mistake. It is not a mistake; it has been constructed to be the way it is. And to those fools who say to fathers complaining about their treatment, “well, if only you’d been a rather more involved father before perhaps your protestations might have met with more success” Mr McGovern’s own case stands in refutation. He is by no means unusual in finding that having been the main carer for many years before separation counts for diddly-squat compared with the downside of being the wrong sex.
But McGovern does not let the fathers themselves off the hook, citing modern men as one of the “four pillars of failure”. He is right; vanishingly few fathers who approach organisations like FNF stick around to help other men afterwards. This is the lack of male in-group preference which feminists do not even perceive and could not comprehend if they did. It is the reason why feminism has been able to rip through society unopposed; it is the reason why ‘patriarchy theory’ is not only wrong, but a psychological impossibility.
Read the book: it is full of truth but less depressing than this review!
Secondly, for UK residents, the Society to Establish a Minister for Men is holding a symposium in Bath on Saturday 17th July (10am – 5pm), details here. If you wish to attend please email firstname.lastname@example.org (not me). I shall be there.